SMOKING

I started smoking when I was 14. The first one was in front of a girl I was courting and trying to impress. I was a short and a lanky kid and I wanted to show her I wasn't a kid anymore by doing things only adults do....and what better way to show that than by smoking. We were standing around this dark corner with some other taller, older kids when I was offered a cigarette in front of her by one of the tougher guys. I blindly accepted, lit and inhaled deeply, only to cough it up immediately. I remember getting dizzy instantaneously and nauseous at the same time. Obviously, this brought laughter and lots of cajoling by the other kids, but I nonetheless still made an impression to the girl since she eventually became my first girlfriend....but that's another story. Anyway, I could never understand that time what drove people to smoke, how bad it really tasted, and what pleasure they actually derive from it. But even if my instincts tell me I was getting into something really stupid, from then on, I started smoking regularly.

I was smoking when I was with friends. I smoked while cramming for an exam. Of course I smoked when I was drinking. I smoked when I was in the bathroom. I smoked before I went to sleep. And the best of all times to smoke, after a heavy meal.....and boy, was it better than dessert! I think I may have reached a pack a day, but I guess this was mostly when I was out drinking with friends....and during my younger days, that happened a lot. So on the average, I was probably smoking a half a pack a day, and this was only because I made it a point not to smoke in the morning. So normally, my first puff occurred after my lunch meal only.

By the time I reached my thirty's, I realized I was already smoking half my life....and that really scared me! I knew I had to stop. So I gradually reduced smoking at first, then attempted to quit cold turkey.....but failed after about a year when I reached out for a cigarette during one of my drinking sprees. Tried again by reducing the number of sticks I smoked in a day to 5 sticks, then quit cold turkey.... again. Thankfully, it's been several years now and I haven't had a puff in years.

I know a lot of people would understand the "supposed" hell I went through when I quit.....and would be proud of me for staying smoke free all these years. I wish all those who are thinking of quitting to have the guts to finally push through with it. ....and I wish those who have failed to also have the guts to try again. I won't lecture you guys on the evils of tobacco.......because I am pretty sure you all know. I just pray you get to do it soon. And for those people who don't get it why people just can't quit smoking, I am happy you never got addicted to it and I just hope you understand, support, and help out the love ones you have who are smoking and wants to quit too.....